Gay Marriage Monogamy Inspires Reckless Behavior

January 13, 2008

Written By: Man - 42 - Gay - Boston

My husband and I jumped at the chance to get married. We’d been together for 15 years and planned to spend the rest of our lives together anyway, so it just made sense. I meant it when I said “I do.”

We’d agreed that we didn’t need to be monogamous as long as we were honest with each other about it. No secrets. The problem was that in reality we’d been monogamous for ten years. We never sat down and decided that. It just happened. It was an unspoken rule. Despite our little two minute chat before we got married, I didn’t exactly feel free to go out and grab the first hot young boy I saw on the street. It just wasn’t that simple.

For some reason being married just made me want to cheat. I wanted it to be secret. When he went to visit his mother without me for a week, I had a chance. I’d been fantasizing about it for months, ever since he planned the trip. I partly expected to go out and try my hardest to pick somebody up and to fail miserably. But actually I got really lucky, or so I thought. These two pretty young boys were looking for a “daddy.” Not my thing, but they were hot. Letting them into my husband’s and my apartment felt so dirty. I loved it.

I’m sure I wouldn’t have done it if I wasn’t drunk. I knew exactly what I was doing, but the recklessness really excited me. I meant to just rub the head on his hot little hole, but next thing you know I’m pounding one of these kids bareback. I only did it for about thirty seconds before my sanity got the better of me and I pulled it out. These idiot kids didn’t seem worried about it at all, so who knows who else they’d let in there. It ruined the experience for me. I played along but already I was worrying.

The next day I realized those two street urchins stole my iPod. I should have been more careful about everything. I’ve been meaning to go get tested, but this happened months ago, so what’s done is done.

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